Nina Is A Blonde?
by JR Salazar
Summary: Another Ultra Maniac fic, and my first song fic. Based on Julie Brown's signature girls' hymn.


This was an idea that spurned in my head today. The song "Cuz Im A Blonde" by Julie Brown seems corny-sounding, but it plays in my head every time. I can't get it out of my system, and with my fetish for Ultra Maniac, I was thinking, why not make a fun song fic out of this? Then my mind (which I affectionately call "the Senate") says, Approved!

I was going to do Maya on this, but it doesn't seem right, despite her being blonde. Nina is going to be the main character in this fic. This was a very fun ficcy that I wrote. I hope you like it. Practice!

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Nina Is A Blonde!?

By Jo-Ryan Salazar

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"Okay class," said Mikami-sensei, "lets open our English books to Chapter 4. We will be discussing the play Hamlet, and…"

"Hmmm…Kaji-kun..." thought Aya dreamfully, looking at her would-be boyfriend, blushing. Maya, meanwhile, was talking with Lulu about the play. She was very interested as well, an indirect student. Jun was busy delving through the play. Somehow, he had a place in his heart for the Bard.

Just then, she saw Nina sneak out the door silently. "Huh?" thought Ayu. "What's the little witch up to now?" She then said, "Mikami-sensei? I have a fever."

"Okay, Tateishi. You're excused," said the teacher. Going back to his class, he said, "Now, class, let's look at the beginning of the first act. In this part…"

---

"Morning! What is it, Nina-sama?" asked her little computer friend.

"Turn me into an idol. And one that is the sexiest!" she said in her Card Captor garb.

"Affirmative."

"Nina, what are you up to?" asked her pet kitty who jumped the gate.

"Rio! I'm going to be a star! The best singing sensation in the universe!"

"I don't think that's a good idea…" he said, a sweat drop coming down his forehead.

"Okay! PRACTICE!"

Out of the treasure chest popped a small chocolate ball. Taking the ball, she ate it, and turned into…

---

[_song starts_]

"Nina, there you are," said Ayu. Shock came. "Ni…na? WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED TO YOU!?"

Nina was in a much more suggestive version of her school uniform, slightly abbreviated. And she had longer hair, longer lashes, and a fuller figure.

"Oh no…" said Ayu to herself.

Winking, Nina strutted suggestively back to class. Walking through the hallways, she started to sing.

"Nina!? What's wrong with you!?" yelled Ayu.
    
    _Because I'm a blonde, I don't have to think._

_I talk like a baby, and I never pay for drinks._

As Nina came into the room, the boys in the class were blushing, and were wide-eyed from looking at her. She had never looked so hot looking. Heck, she was even hotter than Maya! Now she went to the teacher's table, sat, and continued…
    
    _Don't have to worry 'bout getting a man_

If I keep this blonde and I keep these tan 

"Sakura!? What in the world?" Mikami-sensei had only started to catch his breath, when Nina lifted his chin with her finger. Now Mikami-sensei felt quite traumatized. The guys were each starting to feel stiffness below the belt. Perhaps it was the cleavage that peered from her modified outfit.

"What…is Nina…doing?" said Maya. She collaped on her desk, also traumatized.
    
    _Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

_'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

Nina started to literally "shake what her momma gave her." The guys were hooting and hollering, while the girls felt embarrassed. Ayu had circles for eyes. She couldn't speak. The little witch then walked out the door, still singing…
    
    _I see people workin, it just makes me giggle_
    
    _'Cause I don't have to work; I just have to jiggle._
    
    _I'm a blonde, B-L-O-N-D._
    
    _I'm a blonde; don't you wish you were me?_

Ayu followed Nina, who skipping, dancing down the hallways, causing some of the rooms and students to look down the hallway for the dancing witch. The guys who saw started to turn away, because she was too beautiful to look at. Skipping and singing, Nina decided to peer by the cafeteria and library, drunk in her own beauty.
    
    _I never learned to read, and I never learned to cook._
    
    _Why should I bother when I look like I look?_

Of course, a few minutes ago, Jun was on assignment to get a book on Shakespeare. "Ah, so this is where Hamlet holds his sword with this passage," he said to himself, reading. And then, Nina the idol came. "Nina?" She was dressed so uniquely, and so sexily, that it didn't look like Nina at all. "Oh, it's not her." And then, lightning struck. "WAIT A MINUTE!"
    
    _I know lots of people are smarter than me,_
    
    _But I have this philosophy:_
    
    _So what?_
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

Nina immediately kissed Jun, winked, then continued to skip happily, singing. "AH! Where's my camera?" He looked for it, but realized that it was in his backpack, back in the room. Flailing his arms, he zoomed back to get his camera.

---

"Ayu," she said to herself, "where is that witch off to now? She couldn't have turned into someone that sexy. It's not possible. She can't be cooler looking and more attractive than me! Impossible NO, NO, NO!" she said, shaking her head. Finding her composure back, she went out to look for Nina.

The little witch decided to head over to the gymnasium, and athletic fields, where girls and boys in gym uniforms were talking to each other. And she continued…
    
    _I see girls without dates, and I feel so sorry for 'em,_
    
    _'Cause whenever I'm around, all the men ignore 'em,_
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde, nyah, nyah, nyah._
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde, nyah, nyah, nyah._

The guys in the gym dropped what they were doing, and ran off to follow Nina, who was still drunk from her utmost grace. The girls were, of course, not amused.

Pausing in a quiet section of the Shuei campus, Nina reflected dreamily, her skin shiny, and her eyes misty. It felt so great to remember the day she and Ayu met.
    
    They say that to make it, you need talent and ambition.
    
    Well, I got a TV show, and this was my audition:
    
    Suddenly, Ayu felt a headache, and she saw visions of when she and Nina were flying clumsily towards her house. It was traumatizing.
    
    Umm ... okay ... what was it? ... umm ...
    
    Don't tell me ... Oh, yeah, okay.
    
    "AYU-CHAAAAAN! Hold on!"

She immediately snapped out of it, and saw Nina reminiscing in the shade. "Hmmm, Nina's thinking it over. That's nice. I'll se her back in class." She only began to walk away, when she heard her continue to sing and dance. Ayu was back into freak mode all over again.
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

_'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

"Nooooooo!" cried Ayu. "What is going on with her? She's starting to disrupt the whole school with her singing! This is bad. Real bad."

---

Nina walked over to the office, and looked at her class position, still singing…
    
    _I took an IQ test, and I flunked it of course._
    
    _I can't spell VW, but I gotta Porsche,_

"Lady? Wanna ride?" asked a friendly driver. "Free of charge."

Complying, Nina got on the Porsche and went on a quick, 10-minute trip through Minato-ku, before walking back to Shuei.
    
    _'Cause I'm blonde, B-L-I-N-D._
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde; don't you wish you were me?_

"That Sakura Nina's gone too far," said Ayu. It was lunchtime recess "I need to stop her. Now."

"Hey, Tateishi!" said Kaji as he and Tsujiai sat next to her.

"Oh! Kaji-kun! Tsujiai-kun, too! What do you guys want?"

"You know, there was this hot-looking girl who walked by our class earlier today. She looked sooo cute!"

"Cuter than me?" asked Ayu coldly, before blushing at what she said. "Oh no," she thought to herself. "I said THAT! I SAID THAT! He's gonna hate me for sure…"

"Tateishi? I like you. Better than Akiho-san."

"You.do…?" She was on the verge of happiness.

"Mmm-hmmm. Don't worry about it."

"Ahhh! Kaji-kuuuuuuun!" Ayu hugged him so tight, that everyone in the cafeteria saw it. Suddenly, they were distracted by a speech in the quad. All the guys and girls, save Kaji, Tsujiai and Ayu, rushed out the door to see…Nina!
    
    _"I just want to say that being chosen Student of the Month_
    
    _Is, like, a compliment that I'll remember for as long as I can._
    
    _Right now I'm a freshman in my second year at Shuei,_

_But, my goal is to become a magician 'cause I love boys!"_

"What in the world?" said Kaji and Tsujiai.

"That's funny," Tsujiai said. "That can't be…"

"No! It's not! It's not!" Ayu said in front of him, flailing her arms. Looking toward the center of the quad…Nina continued to sing…
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

_'Cause were a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

"Great! Now she has the entire school looking at her!" What even shocked her was the press and paparazzi snooping in over the gate, despite efforts by local campus police. In fact, the gate got trampled down surprisingly easily.
    
    _Girls think I'm snotty, and maybe it's true._

And then, Nina in a flash, stripped down, wearing nothing but her bra and panties.

_With my hair and body, you would be too._

At that point, the boys collapsed to their knees, blushing, and were sexually traumatized with joy. Some had wet dreams, others began to masturbate. All, however, save Kaji and Tsujiai (who were immune to this) had nosebleeds and felt penile stiffness more than ever, and had wide, drooling smiles.

Ayu was now having a bout of insanity. She laughed hysterically, then broke down even more hysterically. "…why? Why does my friend have to flaunt her figure in front of this many people! This is crazy!"

Maya was just heading with the others, when she started to go insane again from seeing Nina's full figure. "Goddamn…that girl is a hottie…" she whimpered. "But why did have to do it here!" She bawled her eyes out. At the sight. Lulu laughed.

Still dancing in her scanty undies, Nina continued to sing…
    
    _I'm a blonde, B-L-  ... I don't know!_
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._
    
    _'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah._

_'Cause I'm a blonde, yeah, yeah, yeah!_

[_song is finished_]

She finished, in a sweet, yet suggestively innocent pose, a bra strap undone, showing even more cleavage. It basically caused the guys to lose their composure. As one, the boys chanted, "WE LOVE YOU NINA-SAMAAAAAAAA!" The girls, meanwhile, had already collapsed when Nina stripped down.

Ayu, trying to regain any sanity, couldn't find it, and she passed out.

"What…was that?" asked Kaji.

"That…was Sakura-san," said Tsujiai icily.

"NO WAY! FOR REAL!?" He collapsed next to Ayu, stunned. Tsujiai, as a precaution, walked to the Tamura-sensei's office to lie down.

-----

"Nina?"

"What, Rio?"

"I think you need to put some clothes on," the kitty said.

Realizing what she did, she said, "Ahh! Ehehehe…I think have to head back to the bathroom to change."

"It's okay, they're sleeping. Quiet, though."

"Right." Slowly, she walked past the boys, and was almost out of the fray when she tripped and fell on Ayu, Kaji, and Tsujiai. This woke them up, and woke the sleeping congregation on the quad up.

"WAAAAAHHHHH!" the four and Rio said, as the convening crowd of students chased them across the school.

-----

Back at the Magic Kingdom, Pine, Bamboo and Plum were seeing this, and were shocked.

"Oh my," said Pine.

"Did you see that?" said Bamboo.

"She's…naked." said Plum.

"Do older girls have bodies like that?"

"I think so."

"I saw an anatomy book."

"And?

"And?"

"When girls get older..."

"What? What?"

"What? What?"

"They have bigger breasts, and an hourglass shape."

"Ohhhhh." Said Pine and Bamboo in unison. The three giggled at one another at the thought.

"Okay, kids," said Grandpa. "What are you guys up to in my room?" He saw Nina in her undies, and her friends being chased by the entire student population. "Aaah! NINA! WHAT RIDICULOUS, FAR-FETCHED MAGIC DID YOU USE NOW!"

"She used the Idol spell, Grandpa," said Yuta, snickering.

"I'm not your grandpa! But, hmmm…WHAT!? THE IDOL SPELL! What in the world!? That's one of the most powerful spells in the book! Doesn't Nina realize that this spell is irreversible!? Once she casts that spell, she has it for life, Yuta! For life!"

"Ooooh, I didn't realize that," he said, seeing a rare lack of knowledge. For once, he lost the battle between wise master and genius student. "You know, I think I'll retire for today, Gramps." Snapping his fingers, he teleported home.

"I'm not your gramps…" he said, but Yuta was already gone.  "Nina…why did you…why…" He sat on his chair, at a loss for words, slumping over in his melancholy for the 145th straight time. This was going to be a long, long day, as the Magic Kingdom continued to bustle with activity outside.

*******

The End

Yo. Feedback. Notice that I modified some of the lyrics, to adapt it to the series at hand.


End file.
